Archive for the ‘News’ Category

RSS mishap

Well, I appear to have spilled the beans in my new blog by adding the wrong RSS feed in the toolbox, temporarily pointing users here. So for you early adopters via RSS, this is not the blog you may have thought you were going to get–and you know too much and will therefore have to die.
In the meantime (while you are still alive), you may be interested in viewing my sleep graph, which I will someday port over to the new blog persona.

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More about Melissa

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/text/2008085333_murdersuicide01m.html

This really bothers me. Obviously, court protection orders aren’t worth the paper they are printed on. If you are threatening murder/suicide, you probably don’t care that some authoritative agency suggests you don’t go near your target. In fact, it will probably just drive the urgency of your desire. Why can’t court protection orders also come with a GPS bracelet, just like those they put on people after they get out of jail so they don’t leave their houses? Only, this version would detect when you come within the limits of your order and notify authorities, who would hopefully come quickly enough. Just goes to show how broken and poisoned our society can be that a guy can go out and buy a gun, get a court order against him and still achieve his dark desires–and that we, as a society, let that happen, made it happen, grew this mindset.

Being a new dad, this stuff worries me.

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Melissa Batten

I just got the news that two days ago, one of my ex-coworkers (at the company I work for now) was murdered: Seattle Times News Article

Melissa was fun and kind. She will be missed by many. I will always think of her when I see LOL cats.
This ones for you, Floxx:

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Sleep Log: Day 1,000

Ok, I haven’t been officially on a polyphasic system for a while (although Ilya has definitely brought my sleep average down to a polyphasic level). Regardless, today marks day 1,000 of my sleep logging. View graphs here. At some point, I’m going to make a better graph that utilizes the data format of my sleep log. Although you can’t tell by the graph (where it appears I just note total sleep for the night), I record start and finish times for all sleep sessions for the 24 hour period of the day, so if I sleep in 4 different segments throughout the day, I have 4 logs for that day.

Appended 2008.07.24: Skye asked about the format of my logs so I took a screenshot of the first 30 entries. In later entries I started tracking what movies I watched in the awake time before the nap, whether I worked, played, etc…

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Male-Female Privilege Checklist: additions

After reading this Marginal Revolution post on the male and female privilege checklist, I noticed a few things the following lists were missing:

First, let me say, I oppose assigning values to this items and comparing whether it’s better to be one sex over the other. Once someone tallied up and said “ok, the score leans to side X”, it’s going to start an endless battle of finding another thing that one sex has over the other. And really, what makes what list and what gets which value, is preposterously arbitrary.
Also, I consider myself a feminist. My additions are not intended to skew to one side or the other. Comment if you like with your additions. Mostly this is just a humorous but honest observation on some inequality in modern day USA culture and in nature. These lists do not include racial or sexual preference advantages.
I avoided mentioning things that are obviously benefits and hinderances at the same time (e.g. men are expected to be better drivers than women–this is sometimes to the benefit of the male and sometimes to the benefit of a female).

anyway, here are my additions:

Male:

  • I can pee standing up, which allows me to pee just about anywhere without pulling my pants down (e.g. in a bottle on a road trip)
  • I don’t have to deal with monthly bleeding
  • If I rise high in my career, I can be comfortable that people will not think I got there through supplying sexual favors to my superiors
  • I can run without worrying about long term damage to pectoral perkiness
  • Video games are more likely to be tailored to my interests and playing style
  • I can compete in sports without people questioning my sexual preference
  • I can have a child without damaging my body in labor
  • I don’t have to get routine pap-smears
  • As I get older, my attractiveness increases (to a point) to younger members of the opposite sex.
  • I am not pressured to feel guilty about what I eat (until I get old)
  • In a crisis situation, someone from my gender is likely to be given (or to take) command

Female:

  • Public restrooms for my gender are likely to be cleaner, some having couches and other luxuries
  • If I am caring for a baby in public, my restroom is more likely to have a changing table
  • I can receive student financial aid without having to ‘volunteer’ for Selective Services (the Draft)
  • If I am moderately attractive, I can advance my career (or begin one) by emphasizing this quality
  • When on a date or with a friend of the opposite sex, it is likely that I will not be expected to pay for anything–regardless of my income level
  • I can display the uninhibited enthusiasm of a child without people questioning my intelligence or sexuality
  • I am not expected to be athletic, lest my value as a member of my sex be questioned
  • when sitting on any splayed-legged object (horse, bike, unicycle, etc…), I don’t have to worry about getting ‘racked’
  • I am not expected to have to deal with spiders, snakes, worms or anything else that may be dangerous or gross (with the exception of snot, vomit, and poop in regard to my own children)
  • Bars and clubs frequently have a weekly night where I get in free. If not, I can probably get someone from the opposite sex to pay for my entrance anyway (and likely some drinks as well).
  • I can dance anywhere with a low probability that people will question my sexuality or sanity
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dSLR Hunt

After much debate between the Sony A700 and the Canon EOS 40D, I’m leaning strongly to the Canon.
Here’s my current dSLR plan:

Camera: Canon EOS 40D, 10.1MP, 6.5fps continuous shooting
http://www.adorama.com/ICA40D.html?searchinfo=EOS%2040D&item_no=1

Lens: Sigma 30mm f/1.4 EX DC HSM AutoFocus Standard Lens
http://tinyurl.com/4g9hwm

And/OR: Tokina AT-X 35mm f/2.8 PRO DX Macro Lens
http://www.adorama.com/TN35MEOS.html

Memory: 8GB CF 40MB/S rw
http://tinyurl.com/2wy5ec

I just need to go play with a Canon 40D a little to solidify my choice–and I’m still looking for a great lens or two. I definitely want a macro lens but I’m not sure if that will be enough.

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Ilya Eivy

Sunday, 5am, I awaken to Lena moaning loudly. It’s never been this loud and tense. I pull myself up to look at her. “Is it time?”, I ask.
“Oh, it’s been going on all night.” she replies, eyes clenched, hands on her torso.
I slump out of bed and meander to the shower. It’s been a while since I’ve woken this early.
Downstairs, I make some eggs and a bagel with Toffuti cream cheese. It’s a filling breakfast that I will later be quite thankful for making. Lena only has a bagel.
Not long after we start timing the contractions, it’s obvious the time has come. We call our midwife and she agrees that we should meet at the birthing center at 7:30am.
“OK, let’s pack it all up.” Everything is already ready so their isn’t much to do but call people.
My mother becomes 15 again when she hears it’s time and rushes out the door of her house in California to start a 12 hour drive to meet us. Lena’s step-mother is flying in and her biological mom lives in Seattle and plans to meet us at the birthing center.
“It’s a 30 minute drive so we should leave now.” I gather up all the stuff, everything we will need for 24-48 hours. I feed the cats extra. We drive.
At the birthing center, things start slow. We put on some music and make Lena comfortable.
After about 5 hours, she’s gone from 4cm dilation to 4.5cm. I try to sooth the moment, “remember our classes? It starts slow, you’ll get up past 5 or 6 and then it’ll shoot up to 10 in only a couple of hours.”
Lena is not entirely convinced but she agrees anyway.
The labor continues. Lena’s step-mother arrives and soon my mother as well.
Many hours later, we get Lena up to 9cm, with only 1cm blocking the head from pushing its way into the birth canal–one little lip of a cervix, stubbornly holding the baby in.
At 7am Monday, 28 hours after the onset of labor, we face a decision. Lena is exhausted. She’s been pushing harder and working more than anyone could believe. The last cm is unmovable. Lena can barely even stand anymore.
We can try to continue and hope it works or we can go to Evergreen hospital down the road, get an epidural, some Pitocin and let Lena rest while the drugs do most of the work. Lena jumps on it (figuratively, she can’t jump worth beans at the moment). “Yes, I want the epidural. I can’t push anymore.”
At the hospital, I’m wary (and weary). The doctors are kind but I still don’t trust them off the bat.
The nurse asks us which shots we want to get and we tell her, “none”. We have it all arranged with our Pediatrician.
“Ok, do you want the Vitamin K?” she continues.
“No, we have that covered.” I sigh, “Basically, if you can just get the baby out and put it on mom’s chest, you guys are done.” The nurse laughs. She’s sympathetic to our plan.
They start telling us what we already knew they would say, “The epidural is on the way. We’ll start the Pitocin and you’ll have a couple of hours but if we don’t see progress, we will need to get the baby out through Cesarean.” We agree to try. We want to do this as naturally as possible. I’m tired. I need a nap. I lay down and about an hour and a half later, I wake up to the doctor’s voice. He’s telling Lena she has to make some progress. I get up and get the details. We need to have contractions that are 2-4 seconds apart and go up to 60 on the seismic scale. I tell Lena to take deep breaths and not to fall asleep. The graphs dip when she rests and get bigger when she breathes deep. I get excited after an hour of this. We are getting there. Some of the contractions are making the mark, others are still lagging a bit.
I get a little hungry and head down to the cafe to get a hard-boiled egg. When I return, the doctor is in the room, explaining how the C-section will go. I guess this means we didn’t make it. I’m disappointed in what appears to be a lack of faith in the progress being made. Every time I see this doctor, I’m walking in or waking up to the conversation already happening.
We consult our midwife (who has been with us the entire time) and she agrees, “we should have seen that last cm go away by now. With the Pitocin, they should have gotten some more progress.”
Before I know it, I’m putting on scrubs and heading into the operating room. It’s brighter than I imagined, not like in the doctor shows where they have special lights shining down at certain spots. The whole room is lit from the ceiling.
The anesthesiologist is very helpful, he directs me and Lena’s mother around the room to the place we can sit. I am right next to Lena, holding her arm and talking to her. Mel stands next to me, with a view of the operation. With Lena, I’m sitting behind the protective shield, with only a small window to peer out at the spot the baby will show up when they extract it. I tell them that I want to announce the gender because it’s a surprise. They are all excited. Surprises like this are uncommon these days.
The operation is quick. and before I expect it, I hear a cry and look up through the opening.
It takes me a second to realize that I was right. I had been starting to believe everyone else’s assurance that the baby is a boy–everyone to their own superstitions and old-tales. I stared for a second to make sure I didn’t announce the wrong gender, how embarrassing would that be?
“It’s Ilya! It’s a girl!”
Lena tears up and they usher me over to the heat table where they wrap Ilya up with bracelets and clean her up. The weigh her and prick her heel to test her blood. She’s 9lbs 3oz, which requires the extra glucose test. She thrashes around and cries loudly. I can’t do anything and feel terribly helpless, like Ilya. I still have my scrubs on, mask and all when they finally let me hold her. I bring her to Lena and they begin to cart her out. “OK, you’ll need to follow us, the baby is tagged to the mom.”
Alarms will go off if the proximity is broken.
I walk out, mask and hat over my head and my mother is standing outside. She doesn’t recognize me or hear me say, “we have to follow them” but I don’t pay attention. I’m staring down at my baby girl, trying to keep an eye on the bed being wheeled around in front of me.

We stayed at Evergreen for 2 nights, my mother and I taking nap shifts to watch the baby while Lena laid recovering from the operation. Evergreen was way better than we expected. They were continually apologetic for our situation, going against our birth plan, but all the while, they were more helpful than we could have hoped. Everything went perfectly. We have a perfect baby.

OK, that’s not nearly detailed enough but it’s the general story. 34 hours of labor, ending in a C-section, we wanted to go natural with a water birth but ended up trying every birthing option available.

Anyway, gotta go check up on on the wife and kid :)

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Emma Kowalczyk (who will always be alive in google)

Had to take a break from working all night to pause before midnight and think a bit about Matt, Ellen and Ella who all lost a loved one today, Emma.

If it weren’t for the countless array of blogs, videos and twitters to remind, report and reflect, I don’t think even my overactive imagination would have fathomed the depth of today’s tragedy. I don’t often cry for people I don’t know well enough to call close friends. Usually, I save those tears for unexpected footage of nuclear explosions and bad things happening to kittens.

But for this, knowing Matt very little and never having met Ellen and Ella, or Emma when I had the chance, I can’t keep working all night, pretending that it doesn’t have an impact.

Lena is 36 weeks and 3 days today. Our midwife checked us out today and everything looks great. Every now and then, I worry about something happening. What if we lost the baby somehow? What if something happened to Lena? What if something happened to both of them? What would I do?
I’ve been thinking about these things a lot lately. Not just even about the baby but suddenly, what if my brother died? What about my mom? or my sister? Would I be able to keep working? Would I move to Thailand and become a monk?
Some part of me (the tactless, villainously selfish portion of my brain) thinks, “at least they still have Ella”. How they would be able to hold together and remain human if they didn’t, I hope will remain a mystery.

I am amazed at the strength the Kowalczyk family has managed to muster and praise their close friends and relatives for keeping them sane. If it weren’t for the strange property of blogs, which allows a person to speak without really speaking out, I would not be able to form words on this subject. I don’t shed tears when I see pictures or videos of Emma. I only shed them when I think of standing in front of Matt and Ellen, trying to formulate something to say. There are no verbal algorithms for this.

Recent related posts:
Matt’s blog
Maislen: Goodby Emma
5 things Stephen Toulouse Learned from Emma

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hacked on april fools day

Not sure yet if this is a random hit or someone I know but it happened:

HACKED HACKER32_BURAK !

h4cker32_burak@hotmail.com

MUCKED

Bravo for not destroying anything–I always appreciate a good security breach as long as nothing is harmed :)

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10 ways the World Could End

Steven Petranek has some great points about where we should be putting defense money and how little Nasa has alloted to stop things that will (scientifically proven) lead to mass human extinction any day now:

One of my favorites is that in 1989, the 4581 Asclepius asteroid (300 meter diameter) crossed through Earth’s orbital field–the place we had been 6 hours earlier–which would have utterly wiped out the human race.

Ted Talk page here

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